Hello, Rachel Bilson and Other News

- Paris Hilton and her boyfriend ran over a pap last night because, haven’t you heard? It’s “Celebrity Do Whatever The Fuck You Want Month.”
- Tony Curtis, RIP.
- Snooki is writing a book. Somewhere, even Satan is going, “You gotta be shitting me.”
- Mel Gibson dropped the baby, too. Of course. Read More …

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Charlie Sheen Supports Lindsay. Oh, Good.

While her mom, and now dad, make their respective moves for the conservatorship they’ve always dreamed of, Lindsay Lohan is getting support from a man who has to have made her new publicist shit at least five kittens if not a pack of marmosets. RadarOnline reports:
“I think she’s doing the best that she can,” Read More …

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Gilbert Gottfried Went For It

Almost immediately after Greg Giraldo’s death, Gilbert Gottfried took to Twitter to be the first to make an obvious joke about his late friend that ruffled a few oversensitive feathers. Even more surprising, Gilbert Gottfried uses Twitter:
If Greg Giraldo is cremated, will that be the “Greg Giraldo Roast”?
Look, I don’t want to sit here and Read More …

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Heidi Klum Quit Victoria’s Secret

Whenever I think Victoria’s Secret Angels should have an age limit of 25, as is my wont, I remember Heidi Klum is still out there and then start to wonder why every woman can’t be as hot as her. (Seriously, would it kill you?) However, all of that’s a moot point as Heidi just announced Read More …

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Greg Giraldo Dead at 44 (1965 – 2010)

Five days after being found in a hotel room where he accidentally overdosed on prescription pills, comedian Greg Giraldo died today, according to TMZ:
A source said the overdose was not a suicide attempt.
Giraldo was best known for his celebrity roast appearances. He had also been a judge on “Last Comic Standing.”
A source close to Greg Read More …

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Lindsay’s Money Problems Are Solved!

It’s like she already knew what I was going to say.
While she’s currently attempting to essentially convince a judge to let her stay at a spa-resort instead of going back to jail for all of five minutes, Lindsay Lohan’s dire financial situation just got a much-needed shot in the arm. Or more appropriately, in the Read More …

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Nancy Reagan Failed Her Country

Here’s Nancy Reagan at The Waldorf Astoria Hotel with a two-year old Paris Hilton who posted the photo on Twitter today. At the time, Ronald Reagan was practically considered Jesus if Jesus was an elderly man with Alzheimer’s from California, so would anyone have really faulted his wife if she, oh I dunno, chucked a Read More …

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REPENT!

The seventh angel poured out his bowl into the air, and out of the temple came a loud voice from the throne, saying, “It is done!” Then there came flashes of lightning, rumblings, peals of thunder and a severe earthquake. No earthquake like it has ever occurred since man has been on earth, so tremendous Read More …

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Kevin Connolly Wants an ‘Entourage’ Movie

Kevin Connolly is lamenting next season of Entourage being its last after HBO pulled the plug due to the show’s out-of-control cost, but he’s hoping for a Sex and the City-style movie because Entourage, at its heart, is also about four women trying to live fabulous lifestyles filled with new shoes. E! Online reports:
The only Read More …

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Khloe Kardashian’s Trying to Get Pregnant

Despite mastering how to perpetually look like she is, Khloe Kardashian is apparently having trouble getting pregnant, according to the latest issue of Life & Style:
“I thought I’d be pregnant by now,” she tells Life & Style. “We’ve been working at it all year.”
But she has a great attitude about it. “Getting pregnant is much Read More …

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Alec Baldwin is a Visionary

Much like Sean Penn, Alec Baldwin might be a violent, short-tempered celebrity who does more harm than good to liberal causes, but I’ll be damned if the man doesn’t have ideas. Specifically ones that end with Blake Lively getting naked. StarPulse reports:
The vegetarian actor, who is a big supporter of the animal rights group, thinks Read More …

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You Can’t Polish an Ewok Turd and Other News

- Lindsay Lohan finally got around to entering rehab.
- Meg Ryan wants to steal Christmas.
- Don Draper thinks Angry Birds is pathetic.
- Blake Lively has looked better. I’m man enough to admit that/ignore my erection.
- Victoria Justice’s “Got Milk?” campaign can’t be legal.
- Taylor Swift Read More …

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Dina Lohan Wants Conservatorship Over Lindsay

Despite the fact he pursued one himself back in April, Michael Lohan is freaking out that Dina might succeed in putting Lindsay under a conservatorship while she goes into rehab. That’s his hard-earned money that somebody else earned! RadarOnline reports:
Michael said he’s aware that Dina and Taylor are making the move behind-the-scenes, in the wake Read More …

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There’s a Megan Fox Upskirt Now

I drink a lot, so I can’t be positive if this is the first Megan Fox upskirt photo to be caught in the wild which is why I’m such a vocal proponent of celebrity crotch tagging. (Blue = 1st time. Red = 2nd, Biohazard sign = Paris Hilton, etc.) Nevertheless, here she is in Italy Read More …

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Lindsay Lohan Wanted $10 Grand For This

While her new publicity team attempted to make it look like she cares about the plight of the homeless and is super-serious about checking into rehab.. eventually, Lindsay Lohan spent the weekend attempting to hock pics of her latest SCRAM device because she hasn’t learned shit about shit. Us Magazine reports:
Lindsay Lohan was calling around Read More …

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Dania Ramirez Had a Pool Party

Here’s Entourage star Dania Ramirez hosting a pool party at Wet Republic in Vegas Saturday because it’s been way too long without a swimwear post. Personally, I preferred her work as Chick Who Kills People With Her All-Black Eyes on Heroes, but that speaks more to my hatred of every single thing on Entourage than Read More …

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Christina Aguilera Looks.. Shiny? And Other News

- George Lopez is leaving the wife who donated him a kidney to save his life. “Thanks, babe!”
- David Beckham will not stop it with the whores, kindly, sir.
- George Clooney has officially been gold-dug.
- Hayden Panettiere could fit right in your pocket.
- Rihanna looks classy. Read More …

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Lindsay Lohan Loves The Homeless Now

Because nothing inspires the homeless like a rich drug addict sporting a court-ordered alcohol monitoring device, Lindsay Lohan stopped by the Dream Center Sunday night to hand out purses to homeless teens. You know, so they have a place for all their cell phones, credit cards, make-up, car keys. God, she’s so thoughtful. E! News Read More …

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Lindsay Lohan Loves The Homeless Now

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Ashton Kutcher is Basically the Pool Boy

While most people aren’t buying Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore’s very public attempts to look like a happy couple, this latest photo posted to Twitter over the weekend actually has me convinced Ashton didn’t bang another woman. Here’s why:
Demi Moore clearly dominates this relationship and has Ashton Kutcher’s balls in a safe deposit box Read More …